tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27614643.post5461745327920909415..comments2023-12-03T10:34:40.333-06:00Comments on Jeremy's Blog: More open honesty: You've [almost] been servedJeremy Gustafsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11390140643945683621noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27614643.post-18775256533233269922013-01-25T19:38:55.665-06:002013-01-25T19:38:55.665-06:00Much I could say, but for a change I'll say li...Much I could say, but for a change I'll say little. <br />Your heart doesn't harden because you were taken advantage of. Your heart will grow bigger and for causes that mean more to you. You also will in time not enable as much too. I've had expensive lessons and I'm sure more to come. I did the best I could with my best intentions .. God asks no more.Doloresnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27614643.post-68803656595325230392013-01-25T16:41:14.019-06:002013-01-25T16:41:14.019-06:00I really admire how selflessly [and practically] y...I really admire how selflessly [and practically] you give to your friends. I think, often, you help people not by just picking them up but by helping them learn to do things on their own. Kudos.<br /><br />You say you try to do good wherever you can. I'd caution you to remember that this includes doing good to yourself. Perhaps that can ease some of the guilt when you remember that you deserve to be taken care of too.Lynneanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27614643.post-78040777363428121992013-01-25T15:41:41.599-06:002013-01-25T15:41:41.599-06:00Hey, Jeremy.
Obviously, I have no problems with t...Hey, Jeremy.<br /><br />Obviously, I have no problems with the ethical code of "do what good you can." I think the question then becomes -- what kind of good can you do? Was good done to H and W in giving them a loan? Of course it was. But now it's put you in a painful situation, and it's given W especially an easy way to delay paying you back. I feel as if the same idea can be applied to the situation with A. You want to help; the need for money is obvious; you set up a way to meet that need, because you can. But it creates a cycle of stress and hurt for you, and guilt and/or avoidance on their part. Something done in the name of good is causing harm.<br /><br />Something I've always liked about you is that you are creative, and that you have a good heart. Here's my call to you: don't go sour because of this. Don't let your heart be hardened. Let your heart be creative, instead. Find a way to help others, with what you have, but not in such a way that you're put in a repeated cycle of pain. Pray. Help them network. Remind them of their own worth. But don't put your good heart at such a risk that it can't bounce back. Like your friend Bernadett says -- be true to yourself. Be true to your good heart, but also be *good* to it.<br /><br />(Signed with love from someone who, after many years in ministry, has only begun to touch the tip of the iceberg of what we seminarians call "self-care.")Emmy Keglerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15909559447944771425noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27614643.post-10760166742150038302013-01-25T14:50:48.799-06:002013-01-25T14:50:48.799-06:00Considered, yes, but the amount I could have gifte...Considered, yes, but the amount I could have gifted was far too small to make a difference.Jeremy Gustafsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11390140643945683621noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27614643.post-35778140721214357692013-01-25T14:38:52.158-06:002013-01-25T14:38:52.158-06:00Have you considered only giving money away, instea...Have you considered only giving money away, instead of loaning it (moving forward, of course, as you can't undo the past)? It may mean that the amount you give people is less, since you're only giving away what you can afford to do without, but then you don't have to deal with repayment.<br /><br />My thoughts on loans to friends boil down to never lending money that I can't afford to not get back.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com