Saturday, March 06, 2010

A Loving Argument

Argumentative by nature, I’ve been in my share of heated debates. Recently I posted a controversial news item on my Facebook wall, and one of my friends sent me a message challenging what I had written. That’s nothing new - for me, Facebook is all about starting conversations.

What is new, though, is the attitude of his letter and our subsequent responses back and forth. I’ve had written debates with this friend before, and today I realized what distinguishes our disagreements from just any typical argument: we share a love and respect for one another that transcends our differences.

Truly, writing my responses today felt very different from any other confrontational message I’ve written. And it took me a while to pin it down. But once I did, it hit me deeply. And it also set me at ease. Yeah, I’m still out to prove a point, to “defend” my side of the issue, but I didn’t feel as intense/aggressive/antagonistic as I normally would. I also realized: I’m actually okay living with the disagreement, because I respect this friend, and even though we disagree on a lot, that just means we have more to talk about :) The brotherly love is stronger than the argument, and that’s really cool to experience.


Gallimaufry Girl said...

I know how much you enjoy hearing about my disdain for kids eat free night. You should go read about it in my waitress-rant only blog:

Jodi said...

I know what you mean! I recently had the same experience with a very dear friend of mine. Neither of us won the other over, but we did respectfully "argue" online for about 10 days, back & forth.

I love debates. When both parties can keep it respectful.